On a more serious note...

I keep finding myself wandering back to this site. Maybe I'm hoping a miracle has happened and that little Preslee did not actually pass away. It is just too sad.

Last Friday when I discovered she had passed away, I grabbed my girls, held them tightly, and sobbed and sobbed. They were very confused by their weeping mama, but I tried to explain why I was so sad and how important they are to me.

Throughout the week I have found myself just watching them playing and thinking about the Sullengers who returned to an empty and silent house full of toys with no one to play with them. Even when my children have shown less than desirable behavior I have thought about those who would take the sound of screaming or whining over the silence that fills the air. When I have started to get frustrated with their mid-night wakings or milk spills or sibling arguments, I can't help but feel grateful to take the bad along with all the good.

It has been a somber and pensive week.

I am incredibly saddened for the Sullenger family as well as other families who deal with sickness, loss, death, or whatever trials may come. Sometimes this world is such a heavy, tragic place.

But I am so grateful for a loving Heavenly Father who is master of it all. Who knows far more than we ever will in this lifetime. Who gives us hope of life after death. I know that families can be together forever. I know that death does not destroy. It's just that wait to be reunited that is so painful.

I want to remember how I felt this week. Maybe tying blankets around little super hero shoulders is more important than neatly-made beds. Maybe that blog post can wait until we've read stories together. Maybe a family walk is more necessary than keeping up with my favorite TV show. Maybe having little helpers in the kitchen is more of a priority than a sparkling clean kitchen floor. Maybe it would be better for me to listen while snuggling rather than yell while sending them to their room.

Not "maybe". Definitely.


Bethany @ Organic Enchilada said...

I have been watching, too, and things like this really do change you. You learn to love more freely, to spend each moment you're given soaking up the joy that is motherhood.

Patty Ann said...

I agree completely. There is an old poem that goes something like this:
Cooking and cleaning
can wait for tomorrow
For babies grow up,
I've learned to my sorrow.
So quiet down cobwebs,
Dust go to sleep.
I'm rocking my baby
And babies don't keep.

May we all use today to be just a little more grateful for the blessings that we have been given. Squishy hugs, sticky kisses, fingerprints and all.

Lisa said...

Definitely. I agree wholeheartedly. Thanks for the reminder.

Jill said...

Wow! Great post. Just what I needed right now too. Thanks :)

Myya said...

What a touching post Evelyn. I too need to stop & remember sometimes that even though hard at moments I wouldn't trade a single second of being a Mommy to three wonderful girls. I hope that the Sullenger family is finding peace in this awful time.

Katy said...

I agree! I can't seem to get them off my mind! And your new blog theme is out-of-this-world awesome!

Debra Joy said...

I have been feeling the same way. You said it so beautifully! Thank you for this post.

Mamarazzi said...

reading this family made me so thankful for the blessings of an eternal family.

their strength is inspirational.

Sami said...

I can't seem to stop crying over this. I am so grateful for eternal families, but that doesn't make that little casket seem more right. I'm doing what you did, and holding my little ones a little tighter, and a little longer today.


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