Monday Melancholy

*grumblegroanwhinemoangrouchgrumble*

Ohhhh, it's been a frustrating day.

And I'm not exactly sure why. It's only Monday and I got all the laundry washed, folded, and put away. I did the dishes. Twice. I vacuumed. Three times. I kept the house tidy and neat all day long. We got homework done. I paid bills. I answered phone calls. I organized paper work. I said my prayers. I read scriptures.

I even squeezed in my P90X workout, which I didn't think was going to happen with all the housework and laundry.

A killer day for a mom of four, right?

But for some reason there was very little joy in all of it. Accomplished though it was, I still felt like I was scraping by all day long, just trying to complete something. Anything.

I'm burnt out on P90X and eating healthy.
I'm wondering if there's anything to my life beyond vacuuming floors.
I'm pessimistic about the clean laundry staying in the drawers.
I'm tired of meat and potatoes and veggies, meat and potatoes and veggies, repeat, rinse and repeat, for dinner.

Blah. Blah. Blah.

Oh me and my monotonous wonderful little life. What a pity I'm so blessed with so many amazing things, eh?

Good thing I saw this today...



If this guy can do it, with a smile on his face, I can do it without grumbling and complaining.

Happy Monday! Here's to a more joyful Tuesday!

Gratitude Photo Scavenger Hunt {Part Three}

21. Something I'm grateful for in the month of November.

My dad.
His birthday is in November. I'm grateful for the caring, goofy, crazy, talented, wonderful man he is.

22. Something I'm grateful for that makes my life easier.

Dora the Explorer.
Meet Dora. She is our second vehicle. She takes Joe to work so I can have the minivan at home. After being a one car family for a few years how I love her and appreciate her presence in our family. She makes my life so much more convenient.

23. Something I'm grateful for that makes my belly happy.

Leatherby's hot fudge ice cream sundaes.
I've never been the biggest ice cream fan...until...we found this little family owned gem. The food is terrible, but oh my stars! that hot fudge is truly something to be grateful for.

24. Something I'm grateful for that reminds me of friends.

Rag quilts.
My friend Lana taught me how to make these rag quilts while we lived in Arizona. Even if we don't live there anymore I am still grateful for my friendship with Lana and all the other amazing friends I have made in all our many moves. I have learned that no matter where you may wander in the world, there are good souls out there. And that is a truth that I am absolutely thankful for. 

25. Something I'm grateful for that is indicative of my city.

Temples.
I live in the Salt Lake valley where LDS temples are almost as "common" as Walmart stores. But there is nothing common about them. Because of temples families can be together forever. I love my family and I want to be a family for forever so you can see why I would have a deep gratitude for temples.

26. Something I'm grateful for that represents my country.

Parades.
I love a good parade. I love seeing people's patriotism on display. I am grateful to live in the United States of America. She may have her problems, but for the most part this great country is about freedom and a better way of life.

27. Something I'm grateful for in my Fall/Thanksgiving decor.

Candles.
This time of year has an abundance of good smells. I'm grateful for all the wonderful scents this time of year has to offer my nose.

28. Something I'm grateful for that gets me from here to there.

Prayer.

29. Something I'm grateful for that keeps me healthy and strong.

Vaccinations and medicine.
My children may not agree, but I am very thankful for medicines that keep us from getting sick or sicker.

30. The final photo challenge is to take a photo of how you intend to spread the Thankful Spirit.

Our Thankful Tree.
I ordered this vinyl tree from my friend Sami's vinyl business. It has been adhered to our front room wall. We started our little Thankful Tree for Family Home Evening on Monday by talking about the blessings we are grateful for. We will keep adding leaves to it throughout the week and on Thanksgiving day with our extended family when they come to visit.

Thank you again to Sarah at Sarah Dawn Designs for hosting this Thanksgiving project. We've had a lot of fun this month pondering and searching for our blessings.

Visit my friend ChemistryMama to see what she and her little ones found in their scavenger hunt.

Gratitude Photo Scavenger Hunt {Part Two}

11. Something I'm grateful for in black and white.

Talents. Particularly the talents of others.
My sister took this picture of me during my first pregnancy. She was using me as a model for practice for her photography class. I have always deeply admired her talents in photography and other creative paths. I have benefited from her talents in having beautiful photographs of my family. I have an appreciation of and gratitude for others talents whether they be photography, musical, homemaking, financial, performing arts, social, etc, etc, etc.

12. Something I'm grateful for in the workforce.

My husband Joe.
Because he works so hard in the workforce I am able to stay at home focusing on mothering our children. I am so grateful he has given me this opportunity. He has an incredible work ethic and I am so thankful for the example and provider he is for our children. And not only does he work hard outside our home, but then he comes home and uses his skills to help our family, such as replacing dead batteries in the minivan.

13. Something I'm grateful for with words on it.

The scriptures.
How grateful I am for the scriptures which bring wisdom and peace.

14. Something I'm grateful for that entertains me.

Blogging.
How can I not be grateful for the medium that not only entertains me but has also given me a creative outlet, a way to record some family history, an opportunity to share myself with others, and the chance to make friends from all over the world? I am grateful for blogging.

15. Something I'm grateful for that is unique to me.

My ancestors.
No one else has my set of ancestors...except of course, my siblings. Regardless, I am grateful for the good people who have made me the unique person who am I.

16. Something I'm grateful for in the retail industry.

Costco.
Where would I be without industrial amounts of toilet paper, bricks of cheese, and cratefuls of batteries? I'm grateful for a place I can go to stock up on things my growing family needs as well as buy a lunch for six people under $10.

 
17. Something I'm grateful for in my neighborhood.

Neighbors.
Shhh. Don't tell our landlord, but I'm pretty sure they should be charging us extra on our rent for the incredible people we get to live by. I'm grateful for such good souls who have cared and loved our family from the moment we arrived in that big orange and white moving van.

18. Something I'm grateful for that keeps me warm.

A garage.
I never knew how much I would appreciate a garage until I had one. I really enjoy being able to hop into my car in the mornings without having to clean the windshields off or warm up the engine. A simple, but wonderful luxury!

19. Something I'm grateful for that makes me laugh.

My children.
These four keep me in stitches every day. How grateful I am to get to live with four little comedians.

20. Something I'm grateful for in regards to the holidays.

My Savior.
How grateful I am for a Savior that loved me enough to come to earth and endure all He did just so that I (and all mankind) could return to live with Him and a loving Heavenly Father. I cannot let the holiday season go by without feeling gratitude for the ones who gave me everything I have and am.

Gratitude Photo Scavenger Hunt {Part One}

It just never fails. Each and every year the holidays come and go by so darn quickly. After they do, some random afternoon in early January, I find myself finally sitting down, letting out a big sigh of intermingled relief and regret, feeling stunned, and wondering how on earth I let another holiday season go by in such a flurry of chaos and chores. 

It doesn't seem to matter that each October I vow that "this will be the year!", the year I will wring every last ounce of meaning out of the holiday season. And predictably this October was no different. Once again, I found myself vowing "This--THIS! will be the year!".

Of course I mean it more this year than I've ever meant before. This year I'm going to do less shopping. Less stress. Less procedure and protocol. Less guilt. Less "To Do"s. More time. More quality. More actions. More service. More family. More love. This year I'm going to make the time to enjoy the holiday. This year I'm going to do my best to reveal the true meaning of the season to my children.

And it starts today!

Many thanks to Sarah at Sarah Dawn Designs for helping me to do that. The kids and I have had a lot of fun preparing to post and link up to her Gratitude Photo Scavenger Hunt. And while my 6 year, 5 year, 3 year, and 10 month olds weren't exactly catching on to the idea of finding specific things on the checklist that we are grateful for, this little scavenger hunt opened up the conversation in our family on gratitude and looking for the things in our life that we are thankful for.

I think we might be off to a pretty good start this year.

Over the next 3 days of posts here are pictures of 30 things that I'm grateful for...

1. Something I'm grateful for in color.

Family. We're a pretty colorful bunch.


2. Something I'm grateful for in nature.

Mountains. "What are men to rocks and mountains?" ~Jane Austen
There is something about mountains that connects to something deep inside of me. They stir me up. They set me soaring. They just make me downright happy. This year in particular I am grateful to live in a home where I can open my window blinds and see incredible mountain ranges in every direction. I imagine my window views have had a little something to do with what a good and happy year 2011 has been.

3. Something I'm grateful for in the city.

Cousins!
And they only live a half hour drive away! This is stretching the term "in the city", but after living so far from our family we're very grateful for a teensy tinsy half hour drive to spend time with our loved ones.

4. Something I'm grateful for at the park.

Green grass.
I never realized how much I took grass for granted until we lived in ugly brown Arizona where there was none. Well, there was some, but it was so prickly and ant infested that you couldn't sit on it without being assaulted. I'm grateful for a backyard and parks with lovely green grass that my children can run and play happily on. I'm grateful for summer evenings spent comfortably sitting on grass.

5. Something I'm grateful for that is soft.

Baby cheeks.
How grateful I am for the gift of motherhood. These precious moments spent nuzzling soft baby cheeks are ones I imagine I will remember long after those cheeks won't let me nuzzle them anymore.

6. Something I'm grateful for that is hard.

Running.
I'm getting a little abstract with this one, but I am grateful for running. It is hard, really hard especially as a mom of four little ones. But it has brought me a lot of joy. I've lost 60 pounds this year partly in thanks to running. I've found an escape and a release. I've discovered that I am capable of so much more than I give myself credit for. Running has developed my muscles and my self esteem. It's hard, but I can do hard things...And be happier because of them!

7. Something I'm grateful for in my closet.

Guns.
I'm grateful to live in a country where I can legally bear arms. I am grateful that I have something I can protect my family with if the occasion should ever arise. And I'm grateful my husband has finally found a hobby for himself.

8. Something I'm grateful for with texture.

Gluten free food.
It's been an interesting year at our house when it comes to food. When I discovered in September that my three year old Elle has Celiac Disease I was terrified at the thought of not having anything to feed my daughter. While it may have a strange texture and be quite expensive, I am grateful for gluten free food that I can safely feed my daughter.

9. Something I'm grateful for in my kitchen.

My Bosch mixer.
My mom found this little beaut at a thrift store for a few dollars. These things normally cost hundreds of dollars, but last forever. I am so grateful she found it. I could never have afforded a brand new one. I use my mixer all the time. Fruit smoothies, breads, cookies, etc. I love my mixer!

10. Something I'm grateful for in the weather.

Snow.
Along with the green grass, I missed the snow terribly when we lived in Arizona. Snow is magical and fun and wonderful. I love it when it comes and I love it when it goes. I am grateful to live in a place with weather variety. It makes me happy!

There are still twenty more things to show you that I'm grateful for. Make sure to come back Tuesday and Wednesday to see more.

And again, thank you to Sarah for hosting such a brilliant blog Thanksgiving celebration! Make sure to visit her to see what other bloggers are grateful for too.

Skool iz rill kul

In my quest to express my gratitude this month I choose to pick on our education system. The gratitude will come later. For now I can't help but share this bit of the kettle-calling-the-pot-black...or however that culinary saying goes.

This is a spelling test that my six year old first grader Dee brought home a few weeks ago.

Can anyone tell me why I was almost doubled over laughing with the irony of it?

All joking aside...I really am grateful for the public servants who take on educating our children. Every now and then I go through the inner debate of taking on homeschooling my children and every time I decide it's just not for us.

Thank goodness there are wonderful people out there who have recognized a talent for teaching within themselves, dedicated themselves to learning how to guide children, and then sacrificed all hopes of lavish salaries to work day after day molding the minds of our young ones. Sure, I've questioned if a few people really should be in the education system, but for the most part I appreciate those who help me in creating intelligent, noble, and wonderful little human beings.

thank you teachers!--I mean: Thank you, Teachers! ;)

Sister, Sisters

Today I am grateful for sisters.



I spent the entire day with my sister, Erin, who lives a mere 30 minutes away and was in desperate need of some adult time.

As our children ran around my house we sat and talked about our childhood memories. We swapped tips on local grocery deals and clipped coupons. We rolled our eyes at the things our husbands do as we professed our gratitude that they saw past our dorkiness and actually wanted to marry us.

We made Christmas plans and wondered about the future of our aging parents. We debated the pros and cons of sister wives as we fed seven hungry children. We ate leftover Halloween candy and coaxed little ones to smile for the camera.

It was a long full day of sister time. Time I no longer take for granted now that I have spent a few years living far far away from "home".

I love both of my sisters. Erin and Camille.


 I'm grateful for the companions they were in childhood and remain to be as we stumble through adulthood, parenthood, and onwards through sisterhood.

From climbing trees, giggling in our bunkbeds late at night, and dancing in the basement to swapping babysitting, sharing recipes, and laughing over sushi. The calenders and faces are changing, but the fun and love is ever the same.

I look at my three little girls and can't help but smile with the anticipation of their forming sisterhood.

They will learn as I have learned that sisters are one of the dearest things we can have in this life. I hope they hold tight to their sisters no matter who steals who's clothes, no matter what friends may come and go, no matter the distance or time that separates them.

Sisters will always be there. Teasing, listening, provoking, cheering, advising, competing, gossiping, remembering, suffering, lifting, laughing, loving as no one else can.

The Little Things

The calender says it's November 1st today.

Funny.

I'm still stuck in August.

I couldn't really wrap my head around September starting and now it's November? Whew. Time is just not kind to me these days.

Typically I would be celebrating that Halloween is over (Ghosts and gore...*shudder*), but this year I kind of maybe actually really enjoyed it. This year my children were old enough to enjoy trick or treating and not too old to be twerps yet. They all looked so cute in their costumes...even if they wouldn't cooperate with our Goldilocks and the Three Bears idea.

What every three year old girl wants to be for Halloween. Fairy, Princess, Princess Fairy, Fairy Princess...Take your pick.




We always knew she was Super!




"Walt Mario" or "Wario". The boy is obsessed.




At least she's a warm flower.

 

The Eternal Quest: To get one picture with all four looking


This was our first year trick or treating door to door and we had a blast! The weather was perfect, the temperature was cool, but not cold. The kids quickly grasped the idea of how trick or treating works and they really enjoyed themselves.

Trick or Treat!


I was so touched by all the neighbors that prepared ahead of time for my little food sensitive kiddos. Dee is allergic to milk (no chocolate and caramel) and Elle has Celiac Disease (no wheat, barley, or rye). Neighbor after neighbor pulled out special treats for my two little ones.

Surveying the loot! Any Milky Way Midnights in there for Mommy?


Have I ever mentioned how much I love my neighbors and living in this area? I really do! It means so much to me that other people care about my children and family and do something so thoughtful. (It's okay to cry when you're trick or treating, isn't it?)

Seeing as how it is November 1st and all...that means anything Christmas is fair game! The music! The decorations! The GOODIES! Not even you Scrooges out there can deny it! It's the holiday season!

For now I'll stick with the season of gratitude and share a few things I'm grateful for. After such a wonderful Halloween night I can't help gushing a bit with gratitude.

I'm grateful for the little things.

I'm grateful for good neighbors and friends!

I'm grateful to be a mom of four young ones. Watching them soak up the season makes me ever so happy!

I'm grateful to be a stay at home mom. Today I am snuggling with my kids watching the snow and rain fall outside. I love the snow and rain! But I love even more watching it from the comfort of my home.

I'm grateful for cute chubby babies that wake up at 4:45 am and help me get out of bed to exercise.

I'm grateful for a mother-in-law who is a fantastic grandma to my children. Happy Birthday Grandma Rochelle!

More "gratefuls" to come as this festive month whooshes by. Watch out! Before we know it it will be February.

The Silver Lining is This

I had a rather clever little post for the day, but I'm afraid it's just going to have to wait. I can't let this day go by without expressing gratitude for all the comments on my post yesterday, the texts of "Hey! You okay?", and the messages of love and support.

Ya'll made me cry again, but with tears of gratitude and love.

Thank you.

Ever feel like the English language just doesn't have the right words to express how you feel? Me too. And that's how I'm feeling today.

So all I can say is...Thank you.

One of my greatest hopes for myself is that someday I can be the kind of friend and family member to others as they are to me. I may be going through a rough spot, but I am truly blessed with family and friendships such as these.

Thank you.

The Good, the NOT Bad, and the Very UN-Ugly

(Cheesy? Probably. But how else do you thank the mysterious early morning snow shoveler?)

As I write this post my three oldest are playing outside in the backyard of our new house.

A fenced backyard. Of their very own. I think I'm gonna cry...

Happy tears!

I've always been a rather emotional person (you read my blog, right?) Over the last month those emotions have swung from despair and depression to joy and contentment.

LIFE IS GOOD!

And I would be a very ungrateful girl indeed if I didn't share it. It's too easy to write about all the trials and tribulations and soak up all the "poor Evelyn"s.

There is a balance.

For as insanely crazy and chaotic that the month of January was, so many good things happened and continue to happen. Honestly, I can't remember the last time I was this happy.

We have been blessed with family and friends who love us and give us so much support, encouragement, and love. We have felt the power of prayers, fasting, and love over the last several weeks.

I can't believe that this still surprises me, but it does. Over the last several weeks people would call or write out of the blue to tell me that they weren't sure why but they had been thinking of us and wondered if we needed anything. Amazing!

Packages of goodies and love arrived in our mail box. Homemade meals came to our door. Visitors sat in our living room unannounced but so very welcome. Blog friends who I have never met in person queried how we were doing and asked if there was anything they could do or just expressed the desire to be closer so they could help.

There were so many offers to help that I didn't even know what to tell people. I always feel kind of silly saying things like "just keep us in your prayers" or "we need your prayers", but if there was ever a time we needed prayers it was this last month. And those prayers were there and the power of them felt. Many times over.

I don't understand how. I don't understand why. I don't think we particularly deserved to be so blessed. We try to do good, but we certainly aren't the most righteous or generous or deserving folks.

In short, all that has happened this last month, the good and the bad, has been overwhelming and HUMBLING. Maybe that's why it happened. Because we needed a good humbling.

Note taken.

As grateful as we were for the help, it was hard to take it.

It was not easy to send my children away with my sister and mom for the better part of a week when I was in the hospital giving birth.

It was not easy to sit on the floor of our trailer in Nevada and watch nine men load up my house in a moving van in the space of an hour.

It was not easy to say "yes" when the Relief Societies of our church asked if they could bring in meals when we were all so sick and again after the baby was born and AGAIN when my husband left town a week after we moved to our new home.

It was not easy to watch my family set up my new house in the space of a day from the comfort of a recliner (something that would have taken me months to complete on my own with the "help" of three kids and a newborn).

It is not easy to feel worthy of so much concern and care. It is not easy to feel this indebted to so many people. It is not easy to find the right words to express the depth of gratitude I have.

I have every intention of paying it back and paying it forward. Possibly impossible, but I'll try anyway.

Starting now...

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!!!

To all our family, to our friends, to the old ward, to the new ward, to the "neighborly" neighbors, to the bloggers, to the complete strangers, for the meals, for the gifts, for the muscles, for the time, for the sweat, for the child care, for the fresh fruit, for the reminders to take it easy and to absorb the time with our new baby, for the shoulders to cry on, for the sympathetic ears, for the hugs, for the phone calls, for the messages, for the hotel stay, for the snow shoveling, for showing up, for being there, for staying, for coming back, for asking again and again and again, FOR THE PRAYERS...THANK YOU from the bottom of our hearts, from the bottom of our toes, and all the spaces in between!

Thank you.

Dear Someone

Dear Hanging by a Silver Lining Readers,

Did I mention how much I love you? Yep. I was so bold as to use the "l" word. It's absolutely shallow of me, but it warms me to the little fetus within to see that map at the bottom of my blog fill with stars each day showing that someone visited my little corner of the blogosphere. Thank you so much for coming, for commenting, for caring! It makes my day, every day! If only I could send each and everyone of you a little something-something...♥♥♥

Sincerely, Evelyn

P.S. If I may be so tacky, you can at least have my new little button (check out the right side bar). And an extra big thank you to Teresa at All4Speakers for not only creating it, but suggesting I have one in the first place. I LOVE IT!

... ... ...

Dear Commentators on my Bullying Begins? post,

I never expected to receive such an outpouring of concerned and conscientious advice. THANK YOU!! It meant a lot to know there were other parents out there experiencing similar situations. I appreciated the wise words!

Just to give you a little update: I did talk to Dee's teacher and she is on top of it. She is a great teacher and I trust her to do everything she can. We also began talking to Dee that he has every right to protect himself if the need arises. I was not really sure how to handle that part and I especially appreciated what you all said. Thank you again!

Gratefully,
Dee-san's Mom

... ... ...

Dear 3 year old Neighbor Girl,

Can't you take a hint?! If no one answers the door after FIFTEEN (NO exaggeration here!) minutes of knocking at my door, windows, and up and down the side of my house, GO HOME! My kids are at school and the youngest one is trying to take a nap while I am trying to get some work done. I don't answer anymore because you never seem to accept my answers anyway when I do open the door.

Besides you're kind of a brat. I don't appreciate you spraying my kids with your hose every time they play outside, including my barely 2 year old little girl. I don't like your little yappy, nippy dog coming into my house. I don't want you taking my kids' toys outside anymore. I am tired of finding your shoes and toys all over my house and porch.

I am sick of feeding you lunch, serving you glasses of water non-stop, and providing you with a bathroom when your house is only a few yards away. Especially when I find the water running and my son's clothes dropped in the toilet after you are done.

When I ask you to leave my house, you should. I know I am not your mom, but this is MY house and I don't think I should have to explain to you over and over again why you need to leave when I say you need to leave. I know both your parents are home all day. I know you are well-fed and loved. So go home and eat and be loved and LEAVE ME ALONE!

Sign Me,
Beginning to Feel Like a Prisoner in My Own House and Too Afraid to Tell Your Parents How Crazy You Make Me

... ... ...

Dear Life,

You are all too precious and fleeting. We just discovered that you left Joe's cousin's wife the other day. She was only 31 years old and had two children (one under a year old). Her family thought she only had the stomach flu and let her rest. Her husband was laying by her in bed when you quietly abandoned her, leaving her family mother-less and wife-less. I am ever-grateful that you choose to stay here and I wouldn't mind if you felt so inclined to continue staying for a very long time. I can see I take you for granted all too often. I am grateful for you and hope I make the most of you after hearing this tragic news.

Somberly,
Contemplating the Great Mysteries of You

... ... ...

Dear People Who Have Asked if I Know What I'm Having Yet,

Nope. But by the 17th of September, I should.
(Don't be modest, baby!)

Not-so-secretly,
Hoping for a Man-Child

... ... ...

Dear Long Hair,

That's it! I can't take it anymore. I realized the other day that I couldn't even remember the last time I had the opportunity to spend some quality time with you. How long has it been since you've felt the warm draft of a blow dryer or the curl of hot rollers? Exactly. Looks like we have very little use for each other anymore. Joe may miss you once you are gone, but you are too high-maintenance and these four kids are sucking all the maintenance out of me. Time to make the cut.

Wearily,
The Girl with the Eternal Sloppy Ponytail

... ... ...

Dear Joe,

Sorry.

Love, The Neglected Long-haired Wife for Not Much Longer

... ... ...

Dear Rainy, Cold Day,

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxxoxoxo

Warm regards,
Sitting Inside, Snuggling Up, and Sipping Chocolate

... ... ...

Go over and visit ShortMama at Family of Shorts to see more Dear Someones!