The Good, the NOT Bad, and the Very UN-Ugly

(Cheesy? Probably. But how else do you thank the mysterious early morning snow shoveler?)

As I write this post my three oldest are playing outside in the backyard of our new house.

A fenced backyard. Of their very own. I think I'm gonna cry...

Happy tears!

I've always been a rather emotional person (you read my blog, right?) Over the last month those emotions have swung from despair and depression to joy and contentment.

LIFE IS GOOD!

And I would be a very ungrateful girl indeed if I didn't share it. It's too easy to write about all the trials and tribulations and soak up all the "poor Evelyn"s.

There is a balance.

For as insanely crazy and chaotic that the month of January was, so many good things happened and continue to happen. Honestly, I can't remember the last time I was this happy.

We have been blessed with family and friends who love us and give us so much support, encouragement, and love. We have felt the power of prayers, fasting, and love over the last several weeks.

I can't believe that this still surprises me, but it does. Over the last several weeks people would call or write out of the blue to tell me that they weren't sure why but they had been thinking of us and wondered if we needed anything. Amazing!

Packages of goodies and love arrived in our mail box. Homemade meals came to our door. Visitors sat in our living room unannounced but so very welcome. Blog friends who I have never met in person queried how we were doing and asked if there was anything they could do or just expressed the desire to be closer so they could help.

There were so many offers to help that I didn't even know what to tell people. I always feel kind of silly saying things like "just keep us in your prayers" or "we need your prayers", but if there was ever a time we needed prayers it was this last month. And those prayers were there and the power of them felt. Many times over.

I don't understand how. I don't understand why. I don't think we particularly deserved to be so blessed. We try to do good, but we certainly aren't the most righteous or generous or deserving folks.

In short, all that has happened this last month, the good and the bad, has been overwhelming and HUMBLING. Maybe that's why it happened. Because we needed a good humbling.

Note taken.

As grateful as we were for the help, it was hard to take it.

It was not easy to send my children away with my sister and mom for the better part of a week when I was in the hospital giving birth.

It was not easy to sit on the floor of our trailer in Nevada and watch nine men load up my house in a moving van in the space of an hour.

It was not easy to say "yes" when the Relief Societies of our church asked if they could bring in meals when we were all so sick and again after the baby was born and AGAIN when my husband left town a week after we moved to our new home.

It was not easy to watch my family set up my new house in the space of a day from the comfort of a recliner (something that would have taken me months to complete on my own with the "help" of three kids and a newborn).

It is not easy to feel worthy of so much concern and care. It is not easy to feel this indebted to so many people. It is not easy to find the right words to express the depth of gratitude I have.

I have every intention of paying it back and paying it forward. Possibly impossible, but I'll try anyway.

Starting now...

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!!!

To all our family, to our friends, to the old ward, to the new ward, to the "neighborly" neighbors, to the bloggers, to the complete strangers, for the meals, for the gifts, for the muscles, for the time, for the sweat, for the child care, for the fresh fruit, for the reminders to take it easy and to absorb the time with our new baby, for the shoulders to cry on, for the sympathetic ears, for the hugs, for the phone calls, for the messages, for the hotel stay, for the snow shoveling, for showing up, for being there, for staying, for coming back, for asking again and again and again, FOR THE PRAYERS...THANK YOU from the bottom of our hearts, from the bottom of our toes, and all the spaces in between!

Thank you.

Putting My Club Foot Forward

You know how we all write about "those" bloggers???

You know the ones... The popular ones with beautiful blog layouts, bigger-than-life pictures, droves of followers, fancy schmancy ideas, and loads of time on their hands which they fill by spending ridiculous amounts of quality time with their perfectly dressed and groomed children, building Eiffel Tower replicas out of popsicle sticks or single-handedly saving a third-world village through a handmade headband fundraiser. That or working out and running 15 miles every morning to maintain that pre-baby body for their super hot, super successful "DH", or skillfully refurbishing every piece of wood, fabric, or metal within a 100 mile-radius.

Those ones.

Well, if you've read much of my blog, you know I am not one of "those" bloggers. Where they like to put their best self on screen, I go for a different technique.

If I tried to put my best foot forward this would be the most boring blog on the planet. I could see it going something like this...

"Look, look 13 followers! I did the laundry today!"


Or "Hey! Comment on how I finally got those dishes washed AND put away! Woohoo!"
Or maybe, I would tell you how awesome I was to get this cupboard cleaned, all the while knowing those papers simply transplanted to one big fat laundry basket to be sifted through "later". But I would NEVER tell you that because I am the "perfect" housewife and mother, remember? At least that's what my blog would tell you.
Or I would tell you how I bathe the kids twice a week or how everyone's teeth are brushed or how we {try to} say prayers every day or how perfect my children are.

So. Not. Interesting.

It's so much funnier to see the chaos, the drama, the big fat FAIL, don't you think? That's because I assume you are laughing WITH me, not AT me. Which you are, right? RIGHT?! Besides, sometimes your comments show that you RELATE. You mean you live real lives too???

I love telling you about all the spilled milks and the public nudities and the maniacal neighbor girls. Plus, who wants to hear their own horn tootin' away all the time? Booooorrrring.

And you do get that I tend to be sarcastic on here sometimes, right? Example: my husband are NOT even close to divorce over the $100 I spent at DI. On the contrary, I think he was grateful for all the back-to-school clothes I found. I know sarcasm doesn't translate so well onscreen sometimes, but honestly, in real life, I am not such a failure. Not always.

I don't feel the need to post it on here every day, but TODAY, I want to say:

I mess up a lot and do so many stupid things. I can be lazy and grouchy.

BUT! BUT!

I am a good person. I am a good wife. I am a good mom. I do good things.

Like what you say? Well...

I read to my kids.
I take them to the library.
I work to expose my children to different events and cultures and foods.
I take them to the park at least once a week, if not more.
I try new recipes.
I wash bed sheets often.
I teach those kids to say thank you and please.
I help them make thank you notes when they receive gifts.
I don't let them watch Nickelodeon or Cartoon Network.
I kiss my husband everyday.
I give breastfeeding a good solid 9 months before calling it quits.
I don't let my kids eat tons of junk.
I never forget to feed my kids. (Now, as for my husband...)
I keep taking three irreverent children to church each week by myself because I know it's the right thing to do.
I don't let my kids listen to Lady Gaga. (So what if they know the words to "Single Ladies"?!)
I don't smoke, drink, or do drugs in front of my kids. (Do I need to clarify I don't do it not in front of them either?)
I teach my kids how to fold their clothes, put their dishes in the sink, wash their hands, and flush the toilet.
I enlist their aid in cleaning house.
I make them dress themselves.
I take care of the paperwork and bills.
I try to express to my husband OFTEN how grateful I am for his hard work at his job.
I tell my kids I love them EVERY day.
I teach my children that all people are Children of God and deserve to be loved and respected.

What good do YOU do?

It's not a contest. It's not arrogance. It's not something I'm likely to repeat much. It's just a Monday morning proclamation that behind this cranky, crusty, snarky, lazy, failing blog front there is a mom/wife/girl who is TRYING to do some good in the world.

How about you? Come on. Don't be shy! I know you do good things too! Tell us all about it!